The World Of Nothingness

2009-11-06T14:53:00.003+08:00

It's been a while since I am at my blog. I know this blog is no longer read by anyone because it's been forever since I have last posted but even so I gonna post for once after so long.

I feel like I am lost in my own cross road of life now, even though I have learnt so many things, done so many things, I still feel not much of a achievement and as usual I am still a jack of all trades yet master of none.

Been doing lots of things lately too, swimming competition which is held at a place that I always try to avoid going, doing things that I seriously don't want to do. Facing it is a really big obstacle for me, seeing people I used to hate and seeing places I used to go and stay. To me now, everything seems so far-off and illusional.

Just a few days back, I wasn't able to keep my cool and got into a quarrel with my good friend, I really want to apologise to that person and say that I don't mean to do so. Sorry for all the times, I have troubled you and thanks for supporting me whenever I am down and continue to stay with me even though others may already leave me out. Instead of being thankful to you, I got angry and quarrelled with you.

Just a while ago, I was doing a quiz on FB and I got this. Haha I don't even know is this real or not but I get the feeling I am like that.

Mysterious... oftentimes, a loner. You know your true friends and only them are allowed to understand the real you.

You’re usually expressive... Open about your emotions and most... of the time willing to talk about it.

You search for love... you’re a hopeless romantic and every time you enter a relationship, you give your all and believe “this is the One.”

You have so many ideas in mind... You’re creative and aggressive! If you want something, you’ll do anything to get it!

You’re an ideal boyfriend/girlfriend... You don’t care if your partner doesn’t really love you as long as you love him/her. You give your all...

You’re undoubtedly good-natured! Most of the time, people are confident to approach you because they know you will consider them.

You love actions... with the hero-like taste! You focus on your strengths and use them to protect persons/things that are important to you.

To people, who are reading this blog, I am not being a emo idiot. Even now, I am still continuing to look forward in life to go against the ugly flow of bad luck in front of me.
Now I know, even useless people can be useful when they really try their best. Nothing will change if you just stand still and wait for people to come. Others are just people who will give you a pull but to hold on to that hand that reach out to you, is the choice of the one who needs it

2009-05-20T14:38:00.002+08:00

ITS BEEN FOREVER SINCE I POSTED WAAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!
I twisted my right hand middle finger...nice right?
damn freaking pain lah. but guess what i still can point middle finger hehehe
now in financial regulation and practices class... freaking boring lah... can sleep...
argh lah typing with a bandage on my hand is a bit the hard ah...
lol i learnt this from my friend nerizza...
I'm bleak, It's over, Fmylife

Phrase
I was always alone but not anymore... I think

2009-03-27T00:44:00.002+08:00

nothing to blog about jus wannt blog up this poem that came to my mind while watching anime and chatting with friends...

there's something in this world that no one has seen before
it is gentle and sweet
maybe if it could be seen
everyone would fight over it
that's why no one has ever seen it
the world hid it so that no one could get their hands on it easily
however, someday, someone will find it
The person who deserves it the most will definitely find it
this is how it's created

that something said in the poem is up to you guys to decide what is it...

The World is full of contradiction, and so am I but that's what has to be changed..

2009-03-25T18:38:00.002+08:00

ALRIGHT!!! Sports camp over a few days ago!!! its great to have my lycan guys as my first batch of freshies... enthu batch of people i must say... sometimes so enthu that we the GLs looks like the freshies instead LOL.... Last day was great... new bonds are form in many ways...
In many meetings, there are always separation. However, this is not really a separation, this is just departure, this is also not the end but a new start. Though it maybe quite lonely at times, but this is what life is all about.
Last few days after sports camp was quite bad for me, especially something happened at home whereby my mother has to be in hospital but now she is back at home scolding me again so she is pretty much fine right now. Plus I also manage to get back my spoiled lappie, fixed it is, as good as new. Missed out many anime episodes too sobsob...
Today went out to buy lunch for my mother, then go out again to sign up for my driving basic theory test but guess what their system was down and if want to wait will take 3hours before my turn... what rubbish... and then I was told that I CAN DO THIS FREAKING REGISTRATION ONLINE... omg such a wasted of time to just go to yio chu kang and back for nothing... before i came home... went to buy popiah for my mother again... no idea how she eat so much when she still is sick.. or rather how is she able to keep scolding me when she is unwell... weird hehehe... omg that doesnt matter, as long as she is fine, seeing her on drips feels like 心痛 like siao... the needle so BIG lah then my mother's hand so SMALL... good thing she is out of there alrdy...
Lastly, SUNDAY IS COMING, MY 19TH BIRTHDAY, you guys must be thinking why am I so excited over a merely 19th birthday, it is not like the 18th one or the 21st one... let me tell you what, every 19th birthday of one person, their western date birthday and chinese date birthday is on the same day... that is like so DAMN COOL!!!!
Hopefully after my birthday, my luck will go for the better this year, as for my result which i surprisingly passed everything this time, I really want it to be much better for this semester, even though I cannot get to be with some of my best friends, I still have a few with me in the same class it seems.

DELTA CHI FOREVER!!!! LYCANS ETERNAL!!!!!! AH!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!!!
PS: Congrats to my CGL who found his love on the MRT(?) train and then please do not be late for your dates like you always do for our group meetings

Quotes

The world changes just by you being here.
See, the monotone scenery is reflected vividly.
Before I'm aware, the separated hands are held together as we walk.
I'll ask that sky
if I'm loving properly.

Even if the day we shall separate comes,
having the days I thought of you is enough.
Someday the day I'll understand why we separated will come.
I'll promise to tomorrow.

2009-03-06T14:50:00.002+08:00

All right!!! I just came back from camp... and guess what I am temporarily a MUTE... I lost my voice totally even though it came back for a moment ytd... lost it since 1st day of camp... how unfortunate.... but the problem is how did i lose my voice when i didn even shout a lot... the price of being a temporary mute cost me $39 and it includes 7 different medicines.... zzz... so many... I hate medicines... ok now i gonna spam my sleeping time to increase my recovery speed.. so ciaos

2009-02-17T19:02:00.002+08:00

BORED AS HELL... havent went out for days... lock myself at home to study... I didn know I can actually sit down and study for more than 4 hours.. normally 4 hours is the max... Just just now I finished studying after 6 hours... quite surprising... but still insecured on whether do i remember or not... always the same problem of remember when reading but forget when closed book... Zzz... dunno what to do already...

Next thing is I HATE BSTATS... i kinda like lost on wat to study... dont even understand what is some of the formula... zzz nvm gonna rest then continue on it tomorrow again... studying too much will have the opposite effect is what i believe so i shall stop studying now and go have fun hehe....

Quotation

Do the impossible, see the invisible...
RAW RAW fight the power
Touch the untouchable, Break the unbreakable
RAW RAW fight the power

2009-02-07T22:57:00.007+08:00

Alright... i jus came back from sports camp bonding camp... nice... stay over night for only ONE night... haha... quite fun... Friday, during IAC, I can seriously say its really very boring... so bored that charmaine and I started playing and taking stupid pics of everything and me doing stupid things... and eventually i am not the only one doing stupid things anymore... I have ben and charmaine doing the same stupid things as me... the russel peters' retard sign...hehe... After that met nick shaw and had him adding in the stupid fun too... freaking funny lah... hehe....the angry looking picture, i was trying very hard NOT to laugh but i bursted out in the end.... anyways monday have DSS paper damn sianzzz...

2009-01-29T00:53:00.004+08:00

LOL... today the swim team (some of us) had reunion dinner at holland Village (first time going there actually) and then we went to this ice cream selling place which name is cold rock... quite nice but expensive (also first time eating that kind of ice cream).... And well I admit I am a VERY homely person thats why the things above are all quoted with 'first time going/eating'.... I dont normally ask people out unless I need to... especially since i have very limited choice of places to go (cineleisure, sunshine plaza, northpoint, raffles place) ...
I mean... come on .... can you actually find any other guy who can get lost in town area like bugis or orchard or even small town area like holland village?... Oh well... everything there is a first time anyways...

Quotes

ね、　もう少しだけ、　もう少しだけきっていて　欲しい。
Hey, just for a little longer, I want you to listen for a little longer.

ね、　もう少しだけ、　もう少しだけわがままいいですか?
Hey, just for a little longer, can I be selfish for just a little longer?

あなたいるそれだけでも、　世界が変わってしまう.
With you just here, my world changed.

いつの間にか　離れていた　手をつないで　歩いてく
We were walking with our hands held, and before we knew it, we had to separate

2009-01-27T02:40:00.003+08:00

First thing first... I just got all my hong bao for the first day... still got second day to go.... kinda tired and a little irritated... go everywhere in singapore to my relative's house... first thing relatives will ask is: ' do you have a gf?' (irritating...)... see people of my age group... cannot even
find any topic to talk... jus stay there alone doing nothing... waiting for hong bao to come...

at night play mahjong with family, try to talk, say i noisy, keep quiet, say i play too seriously... what they want me to do... lose money...say i talk too much... what the hell... fine so what i talk too much... do they even know, even though i may be talking happily, i do still feel lonely in the inside alright... making a fool out of myself... knowing no one will laugh... do not feel very good... let alone tht I have to make jokes out of myself...

See people from my past school, act like never see each other or talk a bit then no topic... See some of my cousins, dont even have a topic to talk...

Even though I always make a fool out of myself... I can always feel the distance in between people and me... so near yet so far... the more i joke the more people is carried away from my actual self...

I dont know is it because I still have the disability to actually trust anyone close or not close to me... but i DO know is that whenever I am with somebody or a group... no matter what we do together or talk together... the after taste I have is just emptiness... I feel very empty... I know all these really sound very emo... but this is really what i am feeling right now in the middle of chinese new year...

Quote

Even though I am always with everyone, why do I still feel so lonely and empty on the inside?

If a person do not wear a mask that decieve everyone of his real self, he cannot never survive in the world

2009-01-24T22:03:00.004+08:00

last thurs dam funny...

first, after sch, went to Orchard with joshua cos I want to retake my japanese class...

but after that we went to Funan IT Mall for some stuff...

first I wanted to check if my com could change Graphics Card, but in the end cannot... =( anyway, after that, we walked around to find joshua's Razer Battlelight...

we ended up in some corner shop that actually sold it!! YAY =D
and I got two games that I rly wanted oso... xD

after we got it we were dam high lol...

after that we wanted to go home liao, but we had to go toilet...

so we went to Peninsula-Excelsior Hotel and used a particular room... the rest-room LOL... xD

dam funny, went inside, go to the high-class toilet, then went back out liao... xD

after that went to raffles place to buy some new pants for chinese new year, 1 pants from japanese $99 and 1 berms from korean $89... COSTED ME A BOMB... but oh well... its chinese new year after all...

2009-01-05T01:12:00.002+08:00

Wahahaha.... Its been always 2 - 3 months since i last posted... too lazy to post anything now...dunno much about what to post also... in another 8 hrs more school's gonna start again... how boring... and now i hav to pretty much stop my japanese lessons for now due to the possibility of going china for 6 weeks... Much to my surprise anyways... I am now the captain of NP swim team... I kinda nervous about setting training programmes and then training people while training myself... anyways.. jus hav to do my best too... A happy late new year to whoever's reading... And one last thing... because i am bored thats why i came up with so much quotation...

Quotation

Love is something that's bittersweet
Simple and clear yet complex and strange stuff

If I polish myself, I'll still shine; limits don't exist
Even if I'm little, there's something that I can't lose to anyone at

Because I want you to know more about me
More than anyone else, I want to bare my self
But I can't do it, I've got Nothing for experience
It's too frustrating
The more I try to show my weakness
The more I act tough in vain
And everything goes the other way

When I fall head over heels in love
For all the time, 24/7
I think about you continuously

My memories engraved into the periods of time when we're together
Are treasures

2008-11-18T15:04:00.002+08:00

coughing coughing and coughing... I am dying from coughing so damn much... cannot stand it anymore... my throat hurts like there is no tomorrow... spent the whole of last night coughing... which means i didn get to sleep very well again... 4 more days till my sis's wedding dinner comes... and YES I DYED MY HAIR... SO STOP ASKING LOL... i didn pay for it though my sis paid for me... since she is the one who requests me to do so.... now in FMS tutorial.... bored as hell... dont understand anything at all, so chim.... got listen, no understanding wth.... arghh... i dont wanna repeat this module wahhhhh....

Quotations

Can you hear it? the melody of truth within...

Do anything you want, do not leave any regrets

2008-11-11T08:48:00.003+08:00

It been a while since i blogged since i was being quite lazy about blogging... everything is so boring and nothing more... another 2 weeks will be my real sister's wedding dinner... and by the end of this week i will have my hair cut finally after like 3 months... my dad have been complaining about my hair been too long... haha... well compare to the others in school, my hair can be counted as one of the few shortest already...
Currently now i am in school, reached school super early with nothing to do, so i became the first student to be in the lecture hall...the experience is rather interesting cause the lecturer actually treat me as an invisible man, well i say hello, he didnt reply me... how rude is that... for your information, if you were thinking maybe he didn hear, i said it so loud that the lecture hall ECHOS, so its quite impossible for him to not hear it... oh well... now i super sleepy... hope i dont fall asleep later...

Quotations
I am just being me, nothing more and nothing less
Being alone is all right, its just me, nothing more and nothing less
Friends, its just everyone, its just more and never less

Between the good and bad is where you will find me

2008-10-22T21:32:00.002+08:00

Well... tough week I am having here... my body is at the edge of breaking down... constantly in pain... to be honest... i have been in the low mood even though i may not look like it... partly also due to the pain i feeling... my body is feeling really very painful and it also feels very heavy... it is like if i ever relax my body down while standing up... I will just fall down on the floor...
another reason to me feeling down.... is some what about the same old inferior complex feeling i having.... haha... i know i know... u guys who are reading and know me... will be thinking: " come on, get over it already.." but its not about the past i am looking at... but i have also no idea what i am feeling inferior at too lol.... maybe its just about the future and stuff...
This morning took the shuttle bus... and same old things happen... me not smiling equals scary... so no one will dare to sit beside me... its quite weird... no matter how filled is the bus... no one is dared to sit beside me... unless someone is forced to... even if someone sat beside me... i can feel like a gap, as in something like a barrier been projected between the sits... to me its rather uncomfortable...
Other than all of these.... I also felt very easily tired out and constantly wanting to sleep.... even though i had plenty full of sleep... maybe its the pain that is causing my willpower to run out and thus been tired or maybe my body is wanting some or rather big amount of rest to grow/recover... the problem here is that I personally do not like to sleep for too long even though I LOVE TO SLEEP because whenever I take long sleeps... I tend to get weird dreams which I very much hate a lot... all those unpleasant memories will just be coming back and in different forms....
ARGH... heck it all... its not like me to think of all of these so much... I am now better off living the way I am... day by day... hour by hour... minute by minute... seconds by seconds... until there is something that makes me want to live for tomorrow comes... I shall be doing this...

Quotes

The sky always covers everything,
Even a false reality on this uncertain earth.

2008-10-15T20:19:00.004+08:00

Was bloody sick this morning... HIGH FEVER... took panadol then went to school... business law isnt as boring as i thought it will be.. or rather it is pretty fun.. maybe due to the lecturer also...
after that had lunch at canteen 4... go back home to sleep after having lunch... took medicine and sleep till now... feeling much better... but still suffering from headaches... side effects of being sick i guess... cannot let my parents know.. if not they will be worried sick again....
found interesting video... or rather its a funny video of this game called metal gear solid 3 subsistance... this funny video is about the main character, snake, planting a C4 (plastic bomb) on the tank and see what happens...

2008-10-14T23:27:00.003+08:00

LOL ... even though school have started, i have job request from work... for some outdoor wedding function... uniform is FULL BLACK... luckily it is not the normal uniform i wear for work haha... I also finally get my PS2 back... sadly it cannot be further upgrade -_-... i feel so sad... it means i have some games i cannot play... School was super boring... especially FMS... wat SSU and DSU... DSU issuing a IOU and SSU accepting the IOU... so many weird weird things to understand.... DSS which works totally like ITB but in the disguise of jus using excel for all the work... finish doing a few of the PBL needed to be done questions before the grouping was even decided LOL....
Tomorrow is a REALLY REALLY boring day... go school for 2 hrs then go home... its like going for nothing la... dont feel like going at all... further more on thursday no class at all.. which means i can sleep the whole day... friday having IS class... its another 2 hrs class again 10am - 12pm... another boring day...
This pic is from one of my favourite anime... tengen toppa gurren lagann... it seems like one of its part of its storyline has been made into an anime movie... cannot wait for the DVD version to come out... haha =p .... waiting for more animes to come and fill in my free time lol

Quotation of the day

Life was beautiful then.
I remember the time.
I know what happiness was.
Let the memories live again

2008-10-10T21:03:00.003+08:00

omg... tomorrow's the big day... the competition day... its being 1 year since i compete and my every aspect is not as good as last time alrdy... i hope i can do well haha... tonight i guess i have to sleep quite early haha... so many things to prepare also... warming up trunks, competition trunks, goggles, swim cap, extra clothes, towel, mats and other stuff... feel so weird after not competing... i dont realli feel nervous or rather i have these thing inside me burning hoping tht it will come soon even though i know i may not win at all... for this competition i realli hope to find back my lost motivation without it, i realli hav not much of a mood to train... last time training was so fun to me even though its super tiring but now i feel like a chore to go to training... feel like it is a drag or something... i still like swimming as always but the mood to train is not there... lets just hope that i get my motivation to train again soon... if not i am as good as going there but not training... training must be enjoyed in order to gain something if not enjoying at all nothing is learnt that is what i think... so good luck to me tomorrow for my swim... hopefully i dont die in the middle of the race haha

Ok i jus got back my altered formal clothes the full set... i onli showing the top since the bottom is all the same

no quotes for today

2008-10-08T18:25:00.002+08:00

Yesterday went training after waking up... training was so tough that i can feel that i am going to puke anytime... training was tough because no one came for the training except me alone... most probably due to the secondary and JC school examination... but having the coach concentrated on you for training isnt such a good thing afterall... more expectation will be needed from that person alone.. had KFC for dinner also... haha... too lazy to buy from market so buy from somewhere near the bus stop thats why i ate KFC haha...
even though today is the day which i don't need to go training... i still feel so tired... mainly because today I had to clean up my super messy room... took me like 4hrs to clean up this small room...but i am quite surprised that my room can actually be this neat after packing up everything... threw away many very old things also... found many old but nice stuffs too... oh and i showered my dog today too... stupid dog... run out when he is wet then slipped and bang onto the table... then started running again like nothing happened... gave me a big shocked when i saw him slide and bang onto the table... thought that he gonna break his bone or something...
nothing much to blog about today... for now i am just happy looking around my room and being impress of myself being able to clean up the whole room in one day... Saturday is coming... means my competition is drawing near also... hopefully i can do well for this coming competition... since my lack of training due to o levels... my stamina, speed and power are not as good as before the o levels... oh well its the short distance events anyways... not like my old 200m fly events that is much more worse than swimming 1500m freestyle... just have to sprint all the way with all my might...

quotations

The light that was born at the world’s end is now in the wind

let shattered dreams echo to the edge of tomorrow

What was won?
At the end of the fighting
What did I hear?
A sad shout

Don’t let anyone cry; return to your filled heart
Overcome just about everything

So to let the sky that I saw back then reach ahead of my wishes
In the morning that creates the world’s beginning, we’re pure white
Now we become the wind

2008-10-06T00:25:00.002+08:00

for some reason after taking off the bandage... the wound still hurts as hell.... just a moment ago when i was changing the plaster, the dry blood cracked and blood starting gushing out from there... i guess its not as much recovered as i thought it is... but well from the amount coming out... there is still signs of recovery... man... wat luck i hav here... am i born under the star of a super accident prone star or something... anyways i slept all the way till 12.30pm then rushed for japanese class make up lesson and had a test... man it was seriously a killer... super hard la... so many ways of answering and dunno whether it is correct or not... all these scares me haha... after that went to buy some cornet breads for my mother, sis and bro... well it seems like before i was born, my god grandfather or something like that who owns a bakery shop last time, used to make it and let them eat... and after he passed away, they had never actually eaten it again... glad to see their happy childish face once in a while... since they are all working and one of them part time studying... stress as hell... not as if i cannot understand what they are going through also... all the stress they had... well being their youngest brother and least financial ability, this is the most i can do for them...
On the way back home on the bus... a motorcycle and a car crushed head to head with the cyclist flying straight into the car... and surprisingly or dunno wat to say to this... both car and motorcycle number adds up together to give 9999... 2718 and 7281.... so coincidentally eh....
came home and had kon ba bao for dinner... i just love my mother's cooking... its always so nice... wish she can cook more at home.... but being a chef and all, she is most prob more sick of cooking than any other average housewives...
1 more week till school starts eh... hopefully it is not a stressful semester =p... if not i will die of stress haha... and start showing my negative side and many people will start coming to kill me and stuff... haha
i look forward going back to school again for the first time i guess... not because i wanna study (impossible.. i HATE studying), its because i made a bunch of realli good friends this time... but... my lazy side is also telling me that i dont wanna go back to school just want to laze around at home haha... partly because i just stopped working to prepare fully for this coming weekends swimming competition IVP... which is all poly and ITE come to together and compete in swimming...
to ppl who wanna come to support... its at toa payoh swimming complex.... not the ticket entrance... there is another entrance in front of the carpark to those who do not know...
it starts at 8.30am but if u want u can come at 9.30am+ since my events are all the way in the middle back part of the day... now i am kinda excited since this will be my first competition in my 1 yr of no competition...

Quotation time

Thinking of you, wherever you are.
We pray for our sorrows to end,
and hope that our hearts will blend.
Now I will step forward to realize this wish
And who knows
Starting a new journey may not be so hard
or maybe it has already begun.
There are many worlds,
but they share the same sky
one sky,
one destiny.

2008-10-05T01:15:00.004+08:00

ok now i am in love with another new anime/novel/manga called ToraDora! it is super funny and interesting.... i too lazy to explain so ppl who wanna know about it... go wiki it or something for its explaination and plot analysis... and what u see on top is the infamous palmtop tiger from the anime haha... once again for further explaination pls go wiki =p...
about my hand... now it has recovered and i had just removed the bandages on the finger... for ppl who didn know... i went to see a doc after my last post, apparently i cut my blood vein and a little more will be my muscle vein which is tht if cut, my finger will be totally jus for show and useless... how lucky i am...

A phrase from ToraDora

There is something in this world which no one has ever seen.

It is soft and sweet.

If it is spotted, I'm sure everyone will want to have it,

Which is why no one has ever seen it.

For this world has hidden it quite well, so that it is difficult to obtain.

But, there will come a day when it is discovered by somebody,

And only those who should obtain it will be able to find it.

That is all.

2008-10-02T19:00:00.002+08:00

Due to over whelming response of 'elson, can you please post something on to ur blog?'... I shall blog today after not blogging for so long and as you also can see i have re-make my blogskin also to clear some spider webs lol...
first of all... this whole holiday i have been working... even though i hav been working... all my pay that i had... sadly enough have to be used for some bills and also as food money... no pocket money during holidays.. so sad for me...
The whole holiday is so boring... i practically jus work, swimming training, eat, sleep most of the time... i didn realli went out to play until recently... and my PS2 is not with me zzz send it for modification and repair
The day before yesterday, I went out to vivo to celebrate one of my fren's bday but unfortunately as it is not very well planned, everything was kinda messed up and some ppl are getting into bad mood for other's indecisiveness... oh well... after that went home and played viwawa with zijia, dawn and cheryl... haha... i keep winning the game whenever zijia go.. stop talking if not L will win the game... so accurate
yesterday went out with my 'god sis' to bugis... so many freaking ppl... keep getting blocked while walking... we had fun at the arcade's crane game wasted $8 on it and get nothing.... a wise person once said: 'crane game machine is nothing but a deposit box that gives you nothing in return'... well... it is really well said haha... after that since both of us had not enough sleep, we just went home to hiberate...
As for today, not really a great day... morning woke up everything is spinning in front of me... too much sleep i guess... went to work and found out that the person who worked before me didnt top-up my things after using... and all the fruits in the fridge are spoiled have to re-cut new ones and while in the process of cutting the lime... someone bumped into me and i cut myself on my finger....FREAKING DEEP CUT THAT NEVER SEEMS TO STOP BLEEDING... EVEN NOW IT IS STILL BLEEDING AFTER 4 HRS.... pain like hell... lime juice into the wound is freaking pain... then coffee machine and the water heater machine both broke down need to replace with a new machine... everything at work was like bad bad bad bad...
after work, went out to buy a formal clothing vest to be worn on my real sis's wedding... even though i was meant to jus buy one vest... i ended up buying the full formal set... ending up wasting 300+ dollars... but guess what the clothes are from japan and it looks kinda nice too... ^_^.... i think i will buy more clothes from their shop soon, they have casual clothes there too.. for some reason a person like me who dont like to shop and dunno fashion well... to actually like a shop for their clothes... that is quite rare lol.... to let you guys know... the shop name is HI>M japan... their clothes are quite nice... lol...

this is how my vest look like... unfortunately, my shirt and pants have to be authored before i can get it... blame my short legs and large shoulders for it... when i get it i will post it up along with it too... lol

LONG TIME NO POST: ELSON'S PHRASES TIME
MADNESS CAN BE INFLUENCE BY OTHERS
AND GOING MAD IS EASY
WHAT IS HARD IS THE COURAGE NEEDED TO GO AGAINST THE MADNESS

2008-07-30T22:41:00.002+08:00

IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I HAVE BLOGGED HAHA!!!!
NOW I AM STILL SUPER DUPER ULTRA MEGA ULTIMATELY IRRITATED...
BY FREAKING SCHOOL WORK AND COMING SCHOOL EXAMINATIONS
SCHOOL IS ENDING SOON FOR SEMESTER ONE... DONT KNOW WHETHER TO BE HAPPY OR SAD... GROUPS OF FRIENDS FINALLY TOGETHER AND NOW ARE FORCED TO BE SEPERATED IF THE TIMETABLE IS DIFFERENT... HOW IRRITATING IS THAT!!!!
TODAY I JUST BLOGGED FOR THE SAKE OF BLOGGING. SO I GONNA GO RELAX AND PLAY MY C&C NOW HAHA....

ELSON GOLDEN PHRASE

DEATH IS EASY, LIVING IS HARD
THUS MAKING LIFE EVEN MORE MEANINGFUL BY CHALLENGE THE DIFFICULT

MIRACLES DONT COME TO YOU. YOU MAKE THE MIRACLES YOURSELF WITH YOUR OWN STRENGTH

2008-07-10T22:17:00.002+08:00

haha... even though i type that i didn mean it... somehow i feel that everything is on me... no space for a place to breath.. emotions....stress....feelings... overflowing within me... everything feel so heavy... I jus dunno anything anymore... today I guess its the first time that I have a long chat with ppl... thanks YJ, Ms R, Mr Bi and Mr K for sharing and listening and advising... so much of a consultant I am to everyone... I only know how to advise but dunno how to use the advise on myself... whats the use advising them?
I feel realli bad to someone partly because I made a joke and she gets serious about it... and i almost seriously going to shout at tht somebody... i apologise if tht person is reading it... I had my reasons and i cannot tell you even though i promised u...

ELSON PHRASE AREA

WORDS OF HOPE ISNT SOMETHING GOOD ALL THE TIME

2008-07-01T14:34:00.000+08:00

ok the official website of my sis's pet clothing shop... pls feel free to go see www.dog-a-holics.net

2008-06-28T22:35:00.003+08:00

Well... this post is for my real sister... whoever have a pet dog or cat... and feel like dressing them up.. go to this blog www.dog-a-holics.blogspot.com... its a blogshop for pets clothings... please take a look...

2008-06-26T23:30:00.004+08:00

i was told this
elson when face to face = positive sunshine boy
elson when chat online = dark and negative boy
Most people say that it is super true...
Well if I am not elson when face to face = positive sunshine boy, when face to face, i will most prob spoiled people's mood
Only when online I can be more of myself in many ways...
I am really a dark and negative boy in some ways... not that i dont want to change... it is just that it is too hard to change...
Sorry if you guys feel cheated by the different me(s) ....
Now I gonna post the story I wrote in boredom... for some people they might think, they have read it somewhere or similarity in the story... please dont flame me.. lol... I wrote this out while talking to my fren on msn... so chill and relax and read the story

Story

in this world, the boy is the only one in the world
thus making him the god of that world

he found himself on a island
and began to understand the things around him

there was a mansion on the island which connects to an old castle by a passage way

he did not know why these buildings are there even though it seems unfit to be in the environment

but he did not need to know why as the boy had never wondered why because he is already there before he even knew it

there were a huge amount of food and needed things for survival inside the castle, so he did not have to starve

even so, the boy almost died a few times due to sickness and injuries.

he then use the mansion as a place to stay, but almost never set his foot in the castle

even though there is no reason to draw a line between these 2 buildings

In the mansion, there is many books, books about humans, relationship, emotions

books that teaches someone how to be like a human

of all the books he read, he notice that there is always 2 person mention in the book living together

as the boy feels empty that he is alone, he begin to do drawings of people

however the images he drew have no faces as he have not seen anyone other than himself in this world

he drew hundreds of them but all of them have no faces

until one day, he came across a book with a lady's picture

he then use the face of the lady to complete his drawings

something mysterious then happened, it was the day after he re-drew all of his drawings with faces, hundreds in numbers.

the two person of his drawings had started to move

but it did not startle the boy because he had no idea of asking himself whether it was abnormal or not

From the beginning, his intial intention was to make 'humans' with the drawing

"Did it work?" the god looked closely at the drawings

looking at the drawings, start to make the boy to feel in a way that he never felt before

a sense of heat and sour feeling came stirring up within him

as the boy do not know what does this feeling means, he did not bother

BAD ENDING

but after some time, the feeling that he felt grew bigger and bigger

he had no idea of how to stop this feeling whenever he looked at the picture

until one day

he burnt all of the drawings that he had drawn

along with the mansion and the castle

until the last bit of everything is burnt to ashes

the boy took his own life away by standing within the fire as he was burning down the drawings and buildings as he do not know the meaning of death

GOOD ENDING

the more he looked at the picture, the more envy he is of the two within the picture

he envy the 'humans' that he have created in the drawings

but he did not know the meaning of envy

he just feel happy looking at the pictures

one day, something weird happened

the lady inside the drawings came out

and the boy once again did not question why as he is the god of this world

the lady brought many different things along with her, happiness and other emotions to teach the boy

over time, he finally understand what is the feeling he felt

at the same time he learnt the meaning of happiness and love

2008-06-26T17:40:00.003+08:00

So boring these past few days, I have been sick also for these past few days... having fever... weird also.. keep going up and down... but now it seems that it is not coming up anymore... So I assume I should be alright already...
This morning, my left eye was red... No idea why.. but for a moment I seriously thought that my eye has been infected... Well, it turns out ok anyways... Well I hav nothing much to post so that is all...
this time no phrases or poem.. couldnt think of any

2008-06-24T22:16:00.004+08:00

So freaking bored... so many problems have arise, problems that relate to my past... why does it have to keep coming back to haunt me whenever I finally begin to enjoy myself... It is as if I am not allowed to enjoy myself... Feeling confused between both hatred of the past and hatred of the present... I just dont know what to do with it anymore... everything seems so confusing... I want everything to end but nothing is ending... instead more and more things are starting... I am always encouraging people and advising people with many different things but weird enough the advices given even though it is said by me, I cannot execute it myself... My feelings, my emotions cannot be expressed out properly... I just want to give everything up already... No reason to continuing it...

Elson phrases

Life is represented by journey
Journey is represented by Living
Walk on in life as a journey to prove that you are living
Half way through the journey
you will find out burdens are heavy
That is how life goes on

Sometimes to protect, those you love
your hands must be stained with blood
Will you still seek for power?

Dying is not as scary as being treated not existed
when died, people will keep you in their hearts
When existence is denied, no one will notice you are there
That is the painful part

Not able to express true feelings and emotions is very tiring
People always regret whenever they did not get a chance to express it
So should I live in a life full of regrets or a life full of no regrets?
That itself is also a very tough question
Scared of rejection, scared of being hurted
All sort of fear comes out when it comes to expressing
No one is able to escape this endless cycle of regreting and fearing
Courage and help is needed in order to escape from this cycle

Both hating and being hated is very tiring,
but no one cannot help but to hate the person they despised
hate cannot be forgotten, cannot be lost
even after a long time, hate is still there
Even so, I still want to forget it, I still want it to be lost
How can I do that... I seriously do not know

2008-06-18T22:39:00.004+08:00

yay... I survived the 10 hrs haha.... first 3 hrs was busy like 'hell' ... the next 7 hrs was bored like 'hell'... in other sense, I was working in 'hell'.... first 3 hrs, I work as what I am appointed to... a bartender... the next 7 hrs, I am appointed as... BARTENDER(WINE, COCKTAIL, COFFEE, TEA AND JUICES) , ORDERING, FOOD RUNNER, BACK STATION AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, A FREAKING DELIVERING BOY... had to go all the way from hitachi tower area to samsung hub... lost my way there, stupid sign so small cannot see... the sign is only on the freaking glass door, walked passed it many times not knowing that is the place I had to send my delivery to...
However, at night, after lunch time, the speed is SO MUCH SLOWER, almost like earning free cash by standing around...
At my work place, I am taught by 2 different person with 2 different methods on 1 thing... however these 2 persons are giving me a big headache... When i use person A's method, person B say its wrong... When i use B's method, A say is wrong... What the hell they wanna me to do.... keep on telling me this is wrong when it is them who taught me... jus following what is been taught to me.... I dont see any wrong there... I bet they must be having a good time... PISSING ME OFF THAT IS....
On my way home, I sat towards marina bay so I can get a sit... at where I sat, opposite me is a row full of girls... This is where the stupid thing started... These girls no idea whether is their screw never screw properly or what... Started taking picture of me playing PSP... They thought I dunno but in actual fact I am just too tired to tell them off... so for like 10mins waiting for the train to start moving backwards from marina bay to yishun, these girls had a good time taking picture of me.... They must be blinded or something, wanting to take a picture of a ugly person like me... not scare their phone spoil meh... haiz... Btw I havent had anything since morning... so now i gonna have something my mum took back from her working place which is the penne pasta and tofu hehe... since its made by the chef at her working place, I think it will be freaking delicious...
Oh one last thing, I have another cut again... hehe

ELSON POEM AREA

Like how I've forgotten what I was like before I met you
If I can forget my memories of when you were around
How much memories that I forget will be all right?

Inside of countless specks of stardust
The lights that are secretly, somewhere, watching over us
We are even now searching for them here

Happiness has a tiny sorrow to it, wherein we always realize
For the first time that it was happiness once we part with it

Wounds that can't heal and words we can't say even after a century
Having made those alone into our guideposts
We are still living here even now

Happiness is a modest thing, wherein we always realize
For the first time that it was happiness once we part with it
Happiness is a precious thing, wherein we always realize
For the first time that it was happiness once we lose it

2008-06-17T21:11:00.002+08:00

These few days, somehow it seems I feel very tired very easily. Always want to sleep, no idea why am I so tired. Nothing to talk about for today also, tomorrow maybe have, 10hrs of work... killer sia... for the money, must work hard.. haha... Today no golden words but have poems to write so have fun reading it...

ELSON POEM AREA

At the intersection of tomorrow and yesterday, you and I don't come across each other

Even if the world rots away, there are things that won't change
Even if we hold back our tears, things that we must protect exist inside of us

That, this, until I get everything, until I rot away, I'll keep standing
Chant on my own, assemble on the earth, release light into the darkness

A confronting heart doesn't need muted sounds
There's no angel who is kind enough to listen to repentances

During mornings and nights, too, I yearn for love and I'll become a star to protect you, without knowing the whereabouts of the battle

2008-06-16T22:29:00.004+08:00

Wahaha... My injury inventory has again increased... this time it is a cut on my right middle finger's knuckle... However I have no idea how did i get a cut there... But it is a small cut... can see from the pic right??? But again this small blood bleeds a lot... maybe because it is one of the joints area... muscles that are constantly being used... so cannot stop the blood from coming out... And guess what I was wondering, WTH IS MY FREAKING BLOOD SO FREAKING FREE, KEEP GETTING INJURY AND KEEP ON BLEEDING??? ahhhh who cares, not like i will die from this or whatever...

Wednesday, I gonna be working for like 10 hrs straight... woo hoo... meaning i will be earning 70 - 80 worth of salary on tht day... Nice!!! even so I hope that less customers will come so i can work less... lol ...

ELSON GOLDEN WORDS

Whenever something happens,
people always thinks that nothing will change,
the world is still going around.
Even though It may seems that nothing has changed
But it is already not the world that I know.
Even if I try to go back,
I can't go back anymore.

Death does not mean that it has ended because one dies
It is like throwing a stone into the pond,
the ripples continue to spread,
never subsiding,
when someone disappears.

People is always connected to the world,
connected in a way which no one can avoid.

People always say: "I have forgotten"
whenever something bad has happened.
But just by forgetting,
it does not mean that it has disappeared.

2008-06-14T02:21:00.004+08:00

Yo... these few days somehow i keep finding time to blog... maybe i am too bored maybe i hav nothing better to do alrdy lol... Anyways I placed a new song on my imeen... it is called おかえり (OKAERI), in english it means welcome back. The song is very nice and the lyrics is meaningful, but unforunately i can only find the lyrics in japanese english, i cannot find the english translation. Practically the song is something like that, welcome back, sweet home, thank you for your love, always acting as if there is nothing wrong, covering up all the melancholy tones, always putting up a smile, Just want to hold you tight, always strongly moved by these strong feelings blah blah blah... its a meaningful song, thanking and welcoming back people. This song is taken from a japanese drama call zettai kareshi (絶対彼氏) aka absolute boyfriend, well it used to be a shoujo manga ( girl manga ) but it became a drama and all my friends who watched it say its nice, so i tried it out. Its quite funny and meaningful. I wont reveal any plots or whatever related to the show here, to prevent spoilers =p but whoever like dramas, i recommend this drama.
My work today was quite fun as usual... 1 table of 10 people and 3 table of 7 people all come at once and order at once... can die sia... so many people... first time I really feel very worned out on things other than training... didnt expect work to be this tiring also, judging on the first 4 day of work... maybe because its friday, thats why so many people... After work, I saw the funniest thing ever, 2 person, 1 male and 1 female, walking with A BIG ONION AND TOMATO HEAD respectively, along Raffles city area... I was like WTH IS WRONG WITH THOSE 2, THE SCREWS IN THEIR HEAD MUST HAVE BEEN LOOSEN OR SOMETHING TO DO SUCH A STUPID AND EMBARRESSING THING ON THE CBD OF SINGAPORE.
After that, I went to one of my swimming juniors birthday party, haha I was the first one there, because I thought that i will lost my way again but in the end it was just beside NP... lol... so much for being a direction idiot -_-''' ... when the others come and give my junior her present, it made me look so bad, not because my present is cheapskate (it is rather expensive, I bought her a CK bag with perfume). It is because others all got wrappings but mine dont have, roughly due to me, being last minute, remember to buy the present but dont remember to buy the wrap... stupid right??? But oh well, its the thought that counts anyways... At my junior's house, the other swimming guys and I were competing DJMAX lol (I LOSE MOST OF THE TIME THOUGH THEY ARE LIKE LVL 50ISH WHILE I ONLI LVL 19 -_-''').. we so bad lor... suppose to go celebrate her birthday.. in the end it became PSP game competition..
Well being there the earliest also means that I will be the first one to leave right? (not realli also la lol) So i went off after cutting her cake, cause parents going out for dinner and dance so i have to rush home to watch the house and the dog... For those who never see my dog before.. this is my dog, Pang, which is a japanese spitz... cute right? Pure white dog with a lot of fur ( lot of fur = hav a lot of things to clean due to its fur drop) Btw my dog ALWAYS sleeps like tht, sometimes it even sleep on my bed with me, going under my blankets when it feels cold...

Smart dog that dont learn what I teach... I teach shake hand, it learnt on its own how to open the gate we lock him in the kitchen when we go out... I teach lie down, it learnt on its own once again how to open my room door by using its head to turn the knot of my door.... no wonder how it learnt these things also... and i didn believe it till it did these things in front of me...
Tomorrow hav jap class after that training.... DAMN SIAN... ZZZZZ.... gonna go slp liao... slpy liao also...

ELSON GOLDEN WORDS

IN LIFE THERE IS ALWAYS A MEETING AND A SEPARATING
EVENTUALLY EVERYONE WILL WALK THEIR OWN PATH
AND LIVE THEIR OWN LIFE
BUT THAT IS NOT FAREWELL, IT IS SETTING OFF
IT IS ALSO NOT THE END, IT IS A NEW BEGINNING
IT MAY GET A LITTLE LONELY AT TIMES
BUT THIS IS WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT

2008-06-12T21:05:00.006+08:00

Woot today I run my station alone again... but this time no mistakes and can run everything successfully alone... not bad leh... Today is one of the chef's birthday lol... Guess what is his name... His name is Nelson.. haha... my old name... good that i change if not later call, both reply... See the pictures there? That is my beauitful hand with plasters and burn marks... If u see clearly the one on the left u will see a small black thin circle there, it indicates my burn mark which is there... Painful sia...
After work, I went training, IT WAS HELL BUT I MANAGE TO TAHAN EVERYTHING, lucky for that. Today also nothing much to blog lol...
Tomorrow going to one of my junior's 16th birthday part lol... hope to have fun there bah.. I going there after work anyways...

ELSON GOLDEN WORDS

WHENEVER YOU THINK THAT SOMETHING IS UNFAIR
JUST REMEMBER THAT NOTHING IS FAIR IN THIS WORLD
IF EVERYTHING IS FAIR IN THIS WORLD
THE WORLD WILL NOT BE A FUN PLACE TO LIVE IN
AS EVERYONE WILL DO THE SAME
ACT THE SAME EVEN LIVE THE SAME WAY
LIFE IS INTERESTING DUE TO THE UNFAIRNESS IN THIS WORLD
HOWEVER IT IS ALSO BECAUSE LIFE IS UNFAIR
PEOPLE WILL THEN LEARN THE REAL MEANING OF CHERISH

2008-06-11T22:07:00.003+08:00

Today is the 3rd day of work for me... Amazingly normally for a new bartender, someone teaching him will be placed with him for 1 week. As for me, on the 3rd day, is working in the bar alone. Well I can say that it is a old post but with a new job scope within. At my last workplace, I am not required to do juices, coffee, tea and ice cream blend. Well, as expected from a job, it is quite stressful when a lot of customers come in at the same time and all ordering at the same time. A new person like me who is still not familiar with the equipments and the placing of things, will of course make a lot of mistake due to that. I even scaled my hand while steaming the damn milk for the creamer and foam. In total in this new job of mine, I have 14 coffees, 9 teas, 12 juices to remember how to make them and how to prepare them and what goes with them on the side. So many things to remember...
Got people ask me, why bother get a job and not enjoy myself in the holiday by just going training and other than that I can slack about after that? To be honest, I don't know at all. It is not even my hobby or interest. Maybe its the pay, maybe it is due to other reasons, I seriously have no idea why. However I do know by working and earning money, I can get less money from my parents and be less dependent on them.
Actually, I kind of screwed up at work yesterday and today, yesterday I almost blended the wrong combination of fruits, today i mixed up Flat white coffee a.k.a milk coffee with Latte.
Hopefully, things will get better soon and I will be able to adapt to the situation and crowd there as it is totally a different pace of the restaurant I worked at last time. This one requires more speed and more or less work depending on how you work.
For people who want to come and visit me, I am now currently working at Hitachi Tower (building next to the MRT stations) Marmalade pantry. Feel free to come and eat there. But please do tell me that you are coming on that day, so not to shock me and make my thinking process cut off (LOL because I only have 2 seconds to think for each order on what to do and what to prepare)

ELSON GOLDEN WORDS AREA (well taken from somewhere)

You can see an unexpected tomorrow.
The day after tomorrow.
Ten years into the future.
In the form of discarded shirts.
In the form of leftover bread.
Your meager house hasn't been built yet.
Let your little dreams remain as little dreams.
Inside you, as it is.
Dangling there and hard to see.
While fading... Halfway through...
As you are falling apart...

2008-06-05T21:33:00.003+08:00

Yesterday, was the last paper for my common test, the ITB paper. Funny thing is I didnt even study for it yet i still have the confidence that i will actually pass the paper. The feeling of leaving early after you finish a paper is so weird, everyone will stare at you and wonder 'how the hell he do so fast' or 'Ah... He must have given up.' haha. Knowing myself, I am not those who will really give up even if it is the last second. After the paper, I went to Kbox with my frens. It's been a while since i had so much fun, singing my head out, laughing about. Not to mention my first time to go to such a place with friends and have so much fun. Starting from today till 2 weeks and 4 days, I will be having my holiday.
Seriously, This bond called 'Friendship' can really be a very interesting thing. Last time, I always hope for holiday to come as soon as possible, so that I can be alone, so that I can get away from everyone, so that I can be myself. Now, for the first time, I dont really wish that holiday will come at all, even if I do not get the time to be alone or be myself. Even though, I am quite used to being lonely but this time it's different. I want to be together with everyone, even if I am not being myself, even if I am just putting up an act.
I am still who I am used to be. Serious and always want to be alone, even though I may be happy and cheerful on the outside. But this is the first time, I feel a sense of belonging, a place where I belong to, from friends. I always thought friends are people who only think of themselves and come to you only when you have the thing or ability they need. Using each other, betraying each other, hurting each other. Even though, its different now but my view of that will not change.
Like people said, it is better to be alert or else you will be sorry afterwards.
For now, lets just see how am I gonna spend there holiday... whether to be the same as usual, work and training, or something unexpected appointments helps to break the 'usual'.
Lastly, whenever people ask who will they give the key to their hearts too, I also cannot answer. But this time I may have found my answer.

ELSON'S GOLDEN PHRASES

'The surface may not show but the inside may be different from what you see. Try to notice the inside, do not be misled by the surface.'

'The truth within the truth. Even if one knows the truth, it may not be the whole thing. One part of the truth always leads to the other.'

2008-05-29T18:20:00.002+08:00

LOL ... LOL ... LOL ... yesterday i went to format my comp after formatting lol... now it is working better than last time... last time the systems tht cannot be loaded up now can be loaded up... but maybe because of new data, my video codec dont seem to be loading up properly...haiz... nvm there will always be a way to solve these problems... this morning went to sch to mug... but didn realli mug... firstly we go to the IT help desk in sch to install my new microsoft office and also anti virus... then also connecting to sch net since i reformatted it... it is no longer connected to sch net...one of my fren was being an annoyance... the person reading this will know who he is... ask him quiet down cause he is making too much noise singing... then he screw came off... he started singing louder and then got himself scolded..how noob is tht... after tht we went to atrium to mug but i didn mug cause i realised tht i actually understand most of the things... but to play safe when before the paper i will mug again... oh ya... my fren asked me why am i always so happy-go-lucky? this is my answer to those wondering about it too... ANSWER: my happy-go-lucky is trained to be... meaning it is a skill not a habit.... get it?.... if not too bad... oh ya... i also did the what tree am i test which i received from one of my frens lol... I am a hazelnut tree... I am said to be: charming, sense of humor, very demanding but very understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active fighter for social causes and politics, popular, quite moody, sexually oriented ( HELL NO ), honest, a PERFECTIONIST, has a precise sense of judgment and expect complete fairness... I dunno how true is this... but you guys shld check it out... or by looking at me, what do u think about the conclusion given? .... haiz... saturday POA test sian ahhhhhhh!!!!!!

2008-05-28T23:31:00.003+08:00

Woah... its been a long time since i blog... wanted to but didn get the time to do it... stupid presentations and projects la... now elearning week... so i get my time to do whatever I want... but after this week or rather this comign saturday is the dreadful common test... even though I onli need to take 3 papers but still I hate test and stuff like that... it is such a waste of time... hopefully i get good grades lor... my MIEC quiz... the bloody system failed me when 2 of my answers was changed by the system.. i put B and E respectively... it came out E and C.... i was like omg if tht didn happen i will have passed... but oh well luckily it is not graded or I die for sure... POA quiz not bad improve a lot.. improved by 12.5 marks ... which is 37.5/50 this time.... not bad eh... tomorrow morning i going to school early to mug some subjects then do some project thing.... wish me luck on everything bah.... relationship wise and study wise lol... Oh ya tht pic on top is my favourite anime pic... 狂乱家族日記 lol... super funny anime ....

2008-05-10T21:41:00.002+08:00

YO WHAT'S UP TO ANYONE READING MY BLOG.... Recently life's pace is getting faster and faster... trying to do my best to catch up on it and not to lose sight of it... To be honest, life is more different than what it used to be... now i have one freaking tall friend which is freaking interesting and weird at times... and another one who tries her best to make me eat healthy and make sure i take care of myself well.... and other friends who seriously tries very hard to matchmake me but fail badly most times lol.... CHARMAINE FROM BFS THIS TIME I MENTION YOU OKAY?... never ever experience this kind of situation before... it makes me feel that i have a sense of belonging and that for the first time i felt warm-ness from people other than my family... At other places all i can do is put up a fake smile to everything and try hard to blend in... but now i dont know am i still putting up a fake smile but i do know i do not need to try hard to blend in cause i m alrdy part of the picture >.<.... on Tuesday I went to watch Ironman with Joshua, Eileen and Nick... Damn funny lor before the movie started Eileen felt asleep... when i try to wake her up... she ditched me with a : 'DONT DISTURB ME I TRYING TO SLP' so freaking funny la... the way Iron man fly also dam funny .... looks dam gay... but overall the movie is nice.... Today actually i had a job request from my senior at work... a sit down buffet for 450 pax at fort canning 8am to 3pm... but unfortunately i cannot accept the request since i hav Japanese class at 1pm... if not i will seriously go lor... cause it seems realli fun to go and work... never tried before to serve such a large amount of ppl... the most i ever served alone being a food runner... meaning waiter who onli serve dont take orders and also to ensure the orders are following smoothly... super important role in a resturant... the amount i served alone was 100pax which was like hell but since 450pax i bet i wont be the onli one running lol... NVM... wait till the holidays come... i go back to work for fun and to earn extra pocket money lol ... projects are piling and presentation is coming... hopefully i dont get crashed by it... if not it will be hell for me once again.... btw i gonna post a song here... this time is a final fantasy song...

Melodies of Life

Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark
   For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart
   To weave by picking up the pieces that remain
   Melodies of life--love's lost refrain
   
   Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why
   We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye
   And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?
   Let them ring out loud till they unfold
   In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me
   Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name
   
  * A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
    Adding up the layers of harmony
    And so it goes, on and on
    Melodies of life,
    To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond
   
   So far and away, see the bird as it flies by
   Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky
   I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings
   Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings
   
   In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?
   Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?
   
  * Repeat
   
   If I should leave this lonely world behind
   Your voice will still remember our melody
   Now I know we'll carry on
   Melodies of life
   Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts
   As long as we remember

2008-05-03T20:33:00.003+08:00

haha...it's been a while since i blogged...recently life is becoming more and more busy... no time to do other things.... everyday got project this and project that.... very tiring sia... this morning went out to do project with my CATS group members.... then play pool after that to relax and destress...lol... come home do housework again... cleaned up the kitchen and living room and my room... every time when i clean up is like wow so many rubbish that can be thrown long ago...no idea why still there... seriously... throw those dam rubbish alrdy.... not till when someone is cleaning up then those rubbish get thrown away.... btw my fellow CATS members good job on finishing most of the project even though the dateline is 2 wks ltr... like tht i can concentrate more on my other projects without a problem lol...

2008-04-28T22:18:00.002+08:00

A BIG SINCERE APOLOGIZE TO CHARMAINE GOH... SHE IS ONE OF MY BEST FRIEND I FORGOT TO PUT HER NAME IN THE LAST LAST POST... SO SORRY!!!!!! I SERIOUSLY DIDN KNOW I MISS OUT ONE PERSON... OK... SO THIS POST HERE IS DELICATED TO CHARMAINE GOH ONLY... SO SORRY I FORGOT TO PUT YOUR NAME... FEEL FREE TO HIT ME WHEN YOU SEE ME... BUT ONLY CAN HIT ME ONCE HEHE...

2008-04-28T20:51:00.002+08:00

SO TIRED....ZZZZ.... SO SLPY.... ZZZZZ..... SO.... ZZZZZZ.... too tired to think of words liao.... so many things to do...yet so little time... so poly isnt as slack as what ppl depicted lol.... not gonna blog much today since i have not much time... this post is jus to prevent my blog from rusting.... haha... btw... to girls reading my blog... pls go to my friend's blog shop... www.kissmydress.blogspot.com ... she is from my CATS group... her name is Jaslin... so whoever wanna buy things from her can also contact me... any questions feel free to shoot it out.... >.<

2008-04-25T21:54:00.002+08:00

Haiz... this few days have been tiring... project project and still project... poly life isnt what ppl think it is... yes it is slacker but it is also quite tiring... depending on which course u are in also... these few days keep having the urge of jumping into bed and sleep straight away... but... not all is bad... i met more new friends.... like nick and eileen... they are really nice people also... but naming onli them will be rude to my other friends... so here goes the other names also.. jamie, pamela, wen quan, shi kai, nigel, jeremy, nicole.... all of them are my good friends lol... oh ya there is also gary, jacob and kenneth... the 'broken wrist gang' but they not homo though jus hav the name for fun... reading lecture notes can be fun since even if u read 75% of the chance u wont understand lol.... is kinda like omg what is it talking about.... alien language sia.... CATS class today was fun also.... a lot of weird ideas made on how to put a whole pear inside a bottle lol... soccer class was kinda rough... i fell down 3 times and got albowed in the eye 2 times.... then since i dont like to do things half'-heartedly... i was practising kicks also... some ppl say i too harkworking but tht is who i m... oh well... soccer can be quite fun too after taking part in it... never really played last time... so haha is quite fun afterall ... can see why ppl is in love with it... hehe... let me end off with a emo sentence tht i jus got from a vid... IF LIFE IS FAIR, ROSES WONT BE FILLED WITH THORNS... and one of my own... IF LIFE IS FAIR, WHY NICK SHAW IS SO TALL WHILE I AM SO SHORT.... lol

2008-04-20T00:26:00.002+08:00

omg... this few days i dont feel like myself... all of the sudden i feel pissed off of myself when i didn train hard enough and seems to be more hardworking than the past me... no idea what the hell is going through my head... For some weird reason yesterday(friday), one of the swim set was 4 x 400,200,100, swimming it this way - 1st 400,200,100 is free, then IM (swim fly back breast(frog) free), then Main stroke which is fly for me, then IM again. Then when i did my fly set, i wasn happy with myself for swimming properly so i requested my next set to be all fly... omg now tht i think back it is kinda like crazy cause i totally tired myself out... now my body is half aching... then today(sat) i spend like 300+ cash for external hard drive and a haversack bag (zinc bag)... now my heart ache... first time spend so much money.... on top of that is my salary + bday money... argh... sch was really fun and all with all these interesting good friends with me all the time... it jus couldn get anymore interesting with them around... lol... btw i wanna thanks nigel for buying a belt for me since he notice tht my jeans is always too loose for me lol... which also means i getting back more to my old self look lol.. ok i need to slp liao... tomorrow hav to wake up freaking early jus to go training... now that i think of it... the reason i couldn train hard was tht i didn hav an aim.. but for some reason i found my motivation time to time so i can train hard at times.... hardworking is good but good things doing too much will backfire so cannot do too much lol... kk seriously gonna slp liao... so whoever reading this now.. is good night to u lol >.<

2008-04-15T20:39:00.002+08:00

Argh... dying right here from being dam tired... woke up early go school... then after class walk the whole school for freaking tickets and EZ link card... dammit man my ez link card looks like some gangster that wanna fight la... This morning go to school dam early... saw a emo looking guy who is named PAUL TWOHILL... lol... he quite power first day of sch... come one hour then went home... (over heard his phone conversation cause he sitting jus behind me) ... Dammit la the DND thingy in school during 2nd may... I heard from my friends that we need a dance partner lor... are they trying to make a couple out of it or are they trying to mock singles with it??? Now i dont know whether i shld go or not... like as if i have anyone to ask lor... nvm i hav 2wks before the DND... I must try my best to find one.. if not i have to stay at home alone the whole day while my other family members go for holiday... then i will hav to be alone with my beloved dog...

2008-04-13T13:25:00.002+08:00

Request of putting up my top 3 favourite phrases by one of my friends who dont want to be named lol but i am gonna put up 4 since i only like these 4...

1) It is not that you cannot do it, it is just that you think that you can't.
2) At time memories restricts our mind but our mind can be freed with new encounters and now they spread their wings to the future.
3) When you are in trouble, reach out your hand and someone will surely be there to hold you hands and help you.
4) Happiness has a tiny sorrow to it at times.

I was thinking when people talks about wings, they say about freedom and stuff... but have they think about that if someone really did obtain wings will they really be free?? I rather think that they will be treated as monsters or some rare animal that is finally found or something... well I mean all these is just fantasy also... so no big deal... lol...

2008-04-12T22:23:00.004+08:00

To clear the confusion of my name... YES I DID CHANGE MY NAME BEFORE... From WEE HONG JIE, NELSON @ HUANG HONG JIE, NELSON to WEE WEI JIE, ELSON @ HUANG WEI JIE, ELSON... I have my own reasons to it and sorry i cannot say it out here... so do not be surprise if u hear people calling me Nelson and i reply... my name NOW is Elson ... is jus a reaction since i had the name Nelson for so long and I change it.... All I can reveal is tht i had a dark past which made me do this decision of changing name... but dont anyone thinks that Elson sounds better than Nelson??? Not only so... after I changed my name i feel more better than last time.... so ya i can only reveal so much... only people i think i can trust will know the reason behind it... all you guys have to know is just me being an anime and manga freak and a person who is always trying to find things to talk but in the end talk too much or say the wrong things... Even now just by typing I can hardly find words to say... so erm... thats all to the confusion...

2008-04-11T20:42:00.004+08:00

YAY!!! My BAoc is finished... Manage to make new friends lol.... I wonder who is having the same class as me seh... tht is something i am looking forward to know... my BAoc team mates are a bunch of fun people... =w= ... but today's event can be quite boring since we are just sitting there doing nothing... so dam sian lor... then i also dam unlucky... stupid banner drop on my head half way through the event... but it is also very funny... i heard something tearing, so i was asking people around me whether did they hear any sound but since none of them hear anything, i took it as me imagining too much.. then jus 5 seconds or so after i ask the last person... the banner drop on my head, causing me to be in a shock state of WTF HAPPEN??? That was the most fun part of the day for me... One of my Group member ask me for help for relationship problems when I myself hav never been into one... but oh well no harm giving him some of my MATURE comments... so i did... those who know who i am refering will be laughing right now reading it... Well after giving him my comments and help... Well and guess wat the comments and stuff i gave was more useful than i expected lol... Thinking back... I did help a lot of guys to get their gfs lol.... but the stupid thing is if i can do tht... why the hell am i still single!?!?!? but oh well ... like i always say being single hav it's good points also... cannot say tht is all good also... cause of example like people who thinks tht i hav a VERY unhealthy diet of eating 1 or 1 and 1/2 or 2 meals a day, must hav someone other than my parents to control my diet before i really become very unhealthy... but the thing i am trying to say is not that i am desperate for one... I am just interest in the question why i can help others to get while i had almost zero chance of getting one lol... maybe i am not daring enough or maybe i am jus pure dumb or too ugly tht no girls want me or maybe i am too noisy or emo at times lol ... who knows, maybe there are more reasons... all these makes me wonder a hell lot lol... but arghh screw it... when it's time mean it's time... no use thinking about it so much... the only thing i can say is jus never give up or i will be sorry to myself before i even know it... and good things always comes to those who wait... lol

Oh ya this 2 questions from the pageant competition left me a very strong impressions and I have my own answers hehe =w=.
1) What will you do if today is the last day of the world?
Ans: I will find all means to make it not the last day.
2) If you can choose one special power, what will you choose?
Ans: The power to control water.

Question 2's answer is an influence by some anime that i watched in the past lol... the power to control water is cool... dont you guys who are reading think that it is also cool even though flying seems to be cool also lol

2008-04-09T23:31:00.005+08:00

Charmaine Requested Questions doing them as requested but wont be finding people to do it cause I am too lazy to do so

1) at what age do you wish to marry ?
Depends... when it's time then it's time but if can i hope to be within the range of 24 - 27, same as my brother and sister... =w=
2) What I want most now ?
DS Lite and PS3 (for my playful side)... new external hard drive (for my anime craze side)
3) What do you want to be in the future if you have the chance?
An anime/manga artist or something along the line...after all i draw well
4) Do you think you have enough confident ?
Depends on the situation, if it's during a competition or exam, I have low confidence... but if it is on games, I am somewhat confident that I wont lose easily... but once I am competing, I can be quite a strong will
5) If you can have one more dream to come true, what will it be?
To go to olympics for my swimming and earn fame to my family

6) What are you afraid to lose now?
Bonds that I finally have obtained
7) Do you believe in eternity love ?
No>>> cause have seen many people's up and down in relationships ... Yes>>> looking at my parents

8) if you meet someone that you love , will you confess to him/her?
Depends... 'cause i scare that i cannot even be friends with her anymore if she rejects me

9) How would you spend the 2oo bucks, if i happens to have?
Buy my favourite things... or treat friends depending on who or what's my mood... or jus save it!

10) What requirements to you wish for the other half ?
Nothing much...no need to be super chio but also cannot be super ugly(not trying to be rude)meaning average will also do.... As long she accept me as who I am... I will also accept her as who she is, no matter is good or bad, i will just accept them

11) Which type of person do you hate most?
Back stabbers and 2 faces type of people

12) Do you cherish every single of your friendship?
I do... if not what are friends for if you don't cherish the bonds

13) Do you believe in God of any kind of religion?
I believe in myself more... but i guess I do not have very strong in belief...'cause if there really is a god (be it whatever religion) they must be making a joke out of my life for the past few years but whatever I am saying, I am a Buddhist.

14) What do you think is the most important thing/people in your life?
Important people will be my family and friends... Important things will be my bonds ( two of the same link but not the same kind )
15) Do you believe in Fate & destiny?
To some extent... yeah

16) What do you want your friend to be like ?
Friends who are able to keep secrets and listen to me when i need them to... likewise for them to me...

17) What kind of friend do you wish to be in your friends' eyes?
I don't know what to say... as long as is not 'he is a bloody f**ker' i guess it will be alright

18) If you have a chance, which part of your character would you like to change?
my loner/emo self... and my wanting to find a subject and talk too much attitude... to those who have already find me annoying i sincerely apologize now... Because if I don't talk, i will become like a emo person but if i talk i will TRY not to become a emo person but talk too much in the end..
19) How long is your longest relationship?

I have ZERO RELATIONSHIP so far... sob sob... but being single have it's own good points

20) If your GOOD/BEST friend feels low one day, will you want them to come to you?
I dont mind... I can even wake up from my deepest sleep just to listen to them...

2008-04-09T19:04:00.003+08:00

ok.. so basically today is the ICE BREAKING day or Bonding day.... I make friends with these 3 persons who are realli interesting bunch of ppl .... one of them is Jamie, she didn go for FOC , the other is jeremy from sigma i think... and the last one i forgot ( short term memory ... = w =) .... tomorrow is games day... all i hope is tht no dirty mud or oil or butter games.... after the camp tomorrow i still have to go for swim training so is kinda tiring lol... today i almost kena to be a performer for the last day... lucky tomorrow i need to go training if not i will need to be one... if not, who knows what will happen when i on stage.... tomorrow have to go for the camp early... 0800 meet, so...... I will have to wake up at 0630 or earlier to prepare to go... I m gonna be deprived of sleep again....

2008-04-08T23:10:00.001+08:00

Long time no post an anime song
Katekyo Hitman Reborn Opening Song 2 - Boys & Girls

Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real
Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real

教科書通りの毎日のなか飛び出した
君は男の子
大人になれずに
でも子供でもいられない時もあるだろう
誰もが急ぎ足で過ぎて行く世界で
僕らは流れ星に立ち止まった

ゆずれないものを一つ
たった一つで強くなれる
こわがりな君の手を引いて歩いて行く
勢いを増した向かい風の中を

無邪気な笑顔で恋に恋して夢を見る　君は女の子
誰にも言えずに　独りで抱えた悩める事もあるだろう
誰もが愛想笑うモノクロな世界で　描いた夢に嘘はつけなかった

ゆずれないものを一つ　たった一つで強くなれる
こわがりな君の手を引いて歩いて行く
勢いを増した向かい風の中を　もう邪魔するものは何一つないさ

手を伸ばせばいつかあの星に手が届くと本気で思っていた
誰もが急ぎ足で過ぎて行く世界で　僕らは流れ星に立ち止まった
祈るように。。

ゆずれないものを一つ　たった一つで強くなれる
こわがりな君の手を引いて歩いて行く
勢いを増した向かい風の中を

迷いながら　戸惑いながら　それでもかまわないさ

ゆずれないものを一つ　たった一つ
勢いを増した向かい風の中

Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real
Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real

manual doori no mainichi no naka tobidashita
kimi wa otoko no ko
otona ni narezu ni
demo kodomo demo irarenai toki mo aru darou

dare mo ga isogi ashi de sugite yuku sekai de
bokura wa nagare boshi ni tachi domatta

yuzurenai mono wo hitotsu
tatta hitotsu de tsuyoku nareru
kowagari na kimi no te wo hiite aruite yuku
ikioi wo mashita mukai kaze no naka wo

mujyaki na egao de koi ni koi shite yume wo miru
kimi wa onna no ko
dare ni mo iezu ni
hitori de kakaete nayameru koto mo aru darou

dare mo ga aisou warau monochrome na sekai de
egaita yume ni uso wa tsukenakatta

yuzurenai mono wo hitotsu
tatta hitotsu de tsuyoku nareru
kowagari na kimi no te wo hiite aruite yuku
ikioi wo mashita mukai kaze no naka wo

jyamasuru mono wa nani hitotsu nai sa

te wo nobaseba itsuka
ano hoshi ni te ga todoku to
honki de omotte ita

dare mo ga isogi ashi de sugite yuku sekai de
bokura wa nagare boshi ni tachi domatta
inoru you ni

yuzurenai mono wo hitotsu
tatta hitotsu de tsuyoku nareru
kowagari na kimi no te wo hiite aruite yuku
ikioi wo mashita mukai kaze no naka wo

mayoi nagara
tomadoi nagara
sore demo kamawanai sa

yuzurenai mono wo hitotsu
tatta hitotsu ikioi wo mashita mukai kaze no naka wo

Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real
Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real

Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real
Boys & Girls be ambitious
Boys & Girls keep it real

Rushing out from the norm
You are a young boy.
There are times you're not an adult yet
But you can't stay a child anymore.
In this world where everyone is rushing in a hurry
We stopped upon seeing a shooting star.

There is one thing I can't give up.
With just this I can become stronger
I lead you,who are afraid, by the hand and walk
Through the fair wind which raises our spirit.

Yearning for love innocently
You are a young girl.
Even though you don't say it,
But you have problems too

In this monochrome world where everyone ridicules
Drawing out dreams isn't a lie

There is one thing I can't give up.
With just this I can become stronger
I lead you,who are afraid, by the hand and walk
Through the fair wind which raises our spirit.
Those blocking our way, are all gone now

I stretched out my hand towards the star, and thought, when would I be able to reach it

In this world where everyone is rushing in a hurry
We stopped upon seeing a shooting star to wish

There is one thing I can't give up.
With just this I can become stronger
I lead you,who are afraid, by the hand and walk
Through the fair wind which raises our spirit.

Even though I am lost and puzzled, it doesn't matter

There is one thing I can't give up.
Through the fair wind which raises our spirit.

NICE SONG!!! LOL

2008-04-08T12:29:00.004+08:00

YAY!!!! ..... My new Lappie is here since yesterday damn happy with the specs... but after that i found out one sad thing... MY STUPID EXTERNAL HARD DRIVE CANNOT BE USED WITH A VISTA SYSTEM.... argh..... AND THE STUPID THING SEEMS TO BE FAULTY TOO... SOME OF MY ANIMES ARE UNABLE TO BE TAKEN OUT... but luckily 75% is saved the other 25% is like oh man.... one of the 25% is a whole series called clannad which is a dam freaking good anime....

To answer those people who have been asking me why not put real own picture on blog or msn display picture instead of some anime character's pic... Well, Just take it that i don't like to do so.... if those who have seen my IC will kinda know one of the reason but there is more reason to it though which i won't state cause to troublesome... and come on as an anime craze, u ought to keep thinking how u wish tht u are the anime character himself or herself... like their lifes or their powers.... i mean that is also one of the reasons why people become an anime craze also....

To anime craze ppl, must watch the latest few episode of katekyo hitman reborn... it's dam cool ... wont say why if not will be spoiling the show lol... Power sentence from it : ' 零地点突破 ( Zero Chiten Toppa, Zero point breakthrough).... LOL... always kinda wanted to do that

Oh ya, i have a sudden increase of nicknames all of the sudden from zoe and alison... will be listing them here...
Zoe's given nick >>>> L-son
Alison's given nick >>> L-san, Ookami-san (Ookami = wolf)
As for Why am I a Wolf is because I took a Personality Quiz and It says so

Well, I am indepentent to an extent, strong-willed when it comes to competing and I AM often misunderstood mostly due to bad communication though... Its true that very little people truly understands me even in my family... I am always trying attached to the few that I love and respect... From my past, some ought to know that i am kind of a loner, thats is why I think i always try very eagerly to keep up with my current friends now...

Those who wanna try the quiz, this is the site >>>> http://www.quizilla.com/users/EmrysWolf/quizzes/What%20Is%20Your%20Animal%20Personality

Last time when I am at home, I am always alone cause of my parents are working and my bro and sis are married and working and stuff... Now i have the man's best friend with me... which is a dog... lol... seriously if those who are always alone and thinking of nonsense... get a dog and u will feel different...

2008-04-07T11:07:00.003+08:00

wahahaha finally get to see the movie, ' I AM LEGEND' that everyone was talking about... quite nice sia... in the beginning is a little WTF situation... no idea whats happening but after a while is like OH..... SO THAT IS WHY.... lol kk my new lappie is now on the way...cannot wait for it to come... gonna love my new lappie's specs lol.... Oh ya the dog in the show 'I AM LEGEND'... the dog is cute just like my dog lol .... >w<
BTW to all anime craze people reading my blog... CODE GEASS: THE REBELLION OF LELOUCH R2... is gonna show soon wahahahhahahahahahahahahaha...... i cannot wait for it to come lol
I just also found out the .hack//G.U. Trilogy is out lol.... Man I am really more than a kid than any kid u can find.... I am so freakking happy+ happy+happy... cause now icannot wait for 2 things to finish downloading and i cannot wait for my new lappie to come lol

2008-04-06T20:40:00.004+08:00

yoyo.... yesterday was quite a fun day... first time going out with so many friends... first time doing so many things yesterday... like bowling with friends other than my swim club members and going to pub with friends for a little drink lol.... First time being to marina square and suntec also... the movie 'shutter' is kinda not scary at all, onli some parts are though... the thing tht makes it scary is the sound effect that increases the tension... oh ya and someone was dam funny to shout 'ya ta' during the movie, making everyone in the cinema burst out in laughter instead... Thinking back... if it wasn't for swimming, i wont have to miss out on so many things... but on another view, if it wasn't for swimming, i wont be able to meet so many nice friends... due to swimming ( and drawing ), i was able to get into NP for BFS using JPSAE ... yesterday was also the first time i show so many people my drawings other than my anime craze best friend and my family... people might think tht i m unusual but well thats is who i am... This is the first time I made so many friends and i really hope this friendships will never end... > W < .... This time for sure... I will break the chain away from me... The chain that is named as 'Loner forever' .... Almost all my primary friends that i had have ceased connection with one and other... my Secondary one onli hav one friend and still is but we barely talk cause we never meet... my dark secondary 2 times have zero friends... my ACS life have many ppl who i think can be called as friends... never been out with them cause of swimming and my sec 4 friends almost all scholars from other countries... so unable to contact them and the onli sec 4 friend tht i still in contact is my best ( i assume ) friend called Joash lol... and recently i found another friend called Gerald that used to be my classmate ... see ... the amount of my friends can almost be counted with 10 fingers or even 5... so this time i m not only gonna break the 10 fingers lmit, i will make as much friends as possible... even though i still suck at interacting... i will try my best not to annoy or anger anyone... i will never want to lose anymore friends... = w =

2008-04-04T17:30:00.004+08:00

TENGEN TOPPA GURREN LAGANN OPENING - SORAIRO DAYS(SKY COLOURED DAYS)

君は聴こえる？
僕のこの声が
闇に虚しく
吸い込まれた

もしも世界が
意味を持つのなら
こんな気持ちも
無駄ではない？

憧れに押しつぶされて
あきらめてたんだ
果てしない空の色も
知らないで

走り出した想いが今でも
この胸を確かに叩いてるから
今日の僕がその先に続く
僕らなりの明日を築いていく

答えはそう　いつもここにある

過ぎた季節を
嘆く暇はない
二度と迷って
しまわぬように

数えきれない
ほんのささやかな
そんな後悔
抱えたまま

その背中だけ追いかけて
ここまで来たんだ
探していた
僕だけにできること

あの日くれた言葉が今でも
この胸に確かに届いてるから
昨日よりも今日僕は
僕の生まれてきたわけに気付いていく

答えはそう　いつもここにある

全てがまるで当たり前みたいだった
尊い日々はまだ終わらない

そしてまた
走り出した想いが今でも
この胸を確かに叩いてるから
今日の僕がその先に続く
僕らなりの明日を築いていく

答えはそう　いつもここにある

kimi wa kikoeru?
boku no kono koe ga
yami ni munashiku
suikomareta

moshimo sekai ga
imi wo motsu no nara
konna kimochi mo
muda de wa nai?

akogare ni oshitsubusarete
akirametetan da
hateshinai sora no iro mo
shiranai de

hashiridashita omoi ga ima demo
kono mune wo tashikani tataiteru kara
kyou no boku ga sono saki ni tsuzuku
bokura nari no asu wo kizuiteiku

kotae wa sou itsumo koko ni aru

sugita kisetsu wo
nageku hima wa nai
nidoto mayotte
shimawanu you ni

kazoekirenai
honno sasayaka na
sonna koukai
kakaeta mama

sono senaka dake oikakete
koko made kitan da
sagashiteita
boku dake ni dekiru koto

ano hi kureta kotoba ga ima demo
kono mune ni tashikani todoiteru kara
kinou yori mo kyou boku wa
boku no umaretekita wake ni kizuiteiku

kotae wa sou itsumo koko ni aru

subete ga marude atarimae mitai datta
toutoi hibi wa mada owaranai

soshite mata
hashiridashita omoi ga ima demo
kono mune wo tashikani tataiteru kara
kyou no boku ga sono saki ni tsuzuku
bokura nari no asu wo kizuiteiku

kotae wa sou itsumo koko ni aru

Can you hear me?
This voice of mine was futile and sucked into the darkness
If the world has a meaning
Then these feelings aren’t useless

I was crushed by my aspiration and gave up
Without knowing the color of the boundless sky

Because my thoughts that started running
Are certainly knocking on my chest even now

The me today will continue ahead
I’ll go build a tomorrow that’ll become us

The answer, that’s right, is always here

I don’t have the time to grieve about the seasons that have passed by
So that I won’t be lost again
While I still held such
Countless and simply meager regrets

I only pursued your back and came here
It’s something that only I, who was searching, can do

Because the words that you gave me on that day
Certainly reach my chest even now

Today, I’ll realize the reason of my having been born
More than I did yesterday

The answer, that’s right, is always here

Everything seemed to be completely obvious
The precious days still won’t end; and again-

Because my thoughts that started running
Are certainly knocking on my chest even now

The me today will continue ahead
I’ll go build a tomorrow that’ll become us

The answer, that’s right, is always here

UPLOADING SONG TO MY IMEEM IF U GUYS WANNA LISTEN TO IT...

2008-04-04T17:19:00.002+08:00

Woots... got my salary today...less than wat i usually earn but oh well good enough... better than having nothing.... Sianz...as usual same dream as the recent days.... went out to laminate some drawings and also buy some folders for the drawings lol... other than that... nothing much.... wasnt really feeling well so i practically slept the whole day till now... what anime song shld i put today lol... gonna put my favourite one....

2008-04-03T20:08:00.004+08:00

Man...Just when i have the mood to train seriously...it have to rain so heavily with thunderstorm.... sian la like that... Nothing much to talk about sia... well actually there is... one weird one.... recently i keep having the same dream of me falling from somewhere and falling to no where... is like never ending... and i think i did talked to someone in the dream but cannot remember clearly.... hope is not a sign of some weird things lol.... the last time i dream about another dream was about this winged man in my dream and the next day i woke up with bruises on my back... some of the ppl who saw my back was also like in shock when they see it... cause it is like the connecting point of a wing to the back... just like how ppl imagine where the wings will be... kinda spooky... i know... hope tht nothing strange will happen by... maybe just coincidence tht these things happened... ok enuff of the talk and here is gonna be my next anime song lyrics write up

GUNDAM 00 OPENING 2 - ASH LIKE SNOW

空　赤く染める　黒檀の闇
呑み込まれた　星屑たち
儚く降り積もる　灰の雪

見つめた嘆きの窓
I never dreamed
凍りつく
there.. I come for you

想いは寂寞の夜空に
舞い上がり　砕けた
この世界が形を変えるたびに
守りたいものを
壊してしまっていたんだ

心にひしめく背徳の闇
君の声が　麻酔のように
冷たく　感覚を奪ってく

矛盾を追いかけても
終わらない
なぜ僕は戦うの?

例えば　光が消え失せて
この地球(ほし)が堕ちても
忘れないよ
その小さな願いが
在るべき場所へと導く

there I come for you yeah
Ash Like Snow is falling down
from your sky
Ash Like Snow
Ash Like Snow
Ash Like Snow
Let me hear...
why　I have to fight

この想いは　寂寞の夜空に
舞い上がり　砕けた
闇を拓く栄光と引き換えに
守るべきものを失ってきた
(It's falling from your sky)
虚しすぎる
(Baby I come for you)

砕け散った　欠片に傷つくたび
閉ざされた僕の心を
強くなる事を選んで
ここまで来たんだ

Sora akaku someru kokutan no yami
Nomikomareta hoshikuzu-tachi
Hakanaku furitsumoru hai no yuki

Mitsumeta nageki no mado
I never dreamed
Kooritsuku
there… I come for you

Omoi wa sekibaku no yozora ni
Maiagari kudaketa
Kono sekai ga katachi o kaeru tabi ni
Mamoritai mono o
Kowashite shimatte ita n da

Kokoro ni hishimeku haitoku no yami
Kimi no koe ga masui no you ni
Tsumetaku kankaku o ubatteku

Mujun o oikakete mo
Owaranai
Naze boku wa tatakau no?

Tatoeba hikari ga kieusete
Kono hoshi ga ochite mo
Wasurenai yo
Sono chiisa na negai ga
Aru beki basho e to michibiku

there I come for you yeah
Ash Like Snow is falling down
from your sky
Ash Like Snow
Ash Like Snow
Ash Like Snow
Let me hear…
why I have to fight

Kono omoi wa sekibaku no yozora ni
Maiagari kudaketa
Yami o hiraku eikou to hikikae ni
Mamoru beki mono o ushinatte kita
(It’s falling from your sky)
Munashisugiru
(Baby I come for you)

Kudakechitta kakera ni kizutsuku tabi
Tozasareta boku no kokoro wa
Tsuyoku naru koto o erande
Koko made kita n da

An ebony darkness that dyes the sky red
Swallowed the stardust
Ash like snow falls and accumulates briefly

I gazed at the window of grief
I never dreamed
Freezing onto it
there... I come for you

My thoughts soared up
Into the desolate night sky and shattered
Every time when this world changed its shape
It destroyed
The things that I wanted to protect

An immoral darkness crowds my heart
Like anesthesia, your voice
Coldly steals away my sensations

Even if I pursue contradictions
They won't end
Why do I fight?

Even if light vanishes
And this Earth is corrupted
I won't forget
Your little wish
Guides you to the place where it must be at

there I come for you yeah
Ash Like Snow
is falling down from your sky
Ash Like Snow
Let me hear...
why I have to fight?

These thoughts of mine soared up
Into the desolate night sky and shattered
In exchange for the glory of opening up the darkness
I lost the things that I must protect
(It's falling from your sky)
It's too futile
(Baby I come for you)

Every time when I got hurt by the smashed up pieces
My closed heart
Chose to be strong
And came here

YOU CAN FIND THE SONG IN MY IMEEM LOL IF U WANNA LISTEN THT IS

2008-04-02T13:52:00.002+08:00

Shakugan no Shana Second Opening Song 1 - Joint ^w^

再び見る世界は
塵と残像　淡い影

凛とした背中には
その全てを背負う覚悟がある

どうしたいの？　どうして？
孤独な旅　そう決めたはずだったのに

この手を離さないで
君から伝わる思いから
心に眠る願いが目覚める
強い視線の彼方
迷いない二人の姿が見える
だから進むの　更なる時へ

砕けてく風景に
生きる事の奇跡を知る

特別の意味求め
彷徨い歩く道なき道を

信じたいの　信じて
共に行くと　そう決めて欲しかったから

瞳をそらさないで
うまく言葉にできないけど
胸の深く君を求めている
希望の遥か彼方
迷いない二人の姿が見える
だから進むの　次なる場所へ

悔しさや悲しみが
今までそれ以上の喜びを教えてくれた
そして、隣にいつも必ず
君という存在があるという事も

感じるでしょ
もう何も怖くなんてない

この手を握り締めて
君にしか出せない力が
夢を現実に変えてゆくから
強い視線の彼方
迷いない二人の姿が見える
だから進むの　更なる時へ

futatabi miru sekai wa
chiri to zanzou awai kage

rin to shita senaka ni wa
sono subete wo seou kaku go ga aru

doushitai no? doushite?
kodoku na tabi sou kimeta hazudatta no ni

kono te wo hanasanai de
kimi kara tsutawaru omoi kara
kokoro ni nemuru negai ga mezameru
tsuyoi shisen no kanata
mayoi nai futari no sugata ga mieru
dakara susumu no saranaru toki e

kudaketeku fuukei ni
ikiru koto no kiseki wo shiru

tokubetsu no imi motome
samayoi aruku michi naki michi wo

shinjitai no? shinjite
tomo ni yuku to sou kimete hoshikatta kara

hitomi wo sorasanai de
umaku kotoba ni dekinai kedo
mune no fukaku kimi wo motomete iru
kibou no haruka kanata
mayoi nai futari no sugata ga mieru
dakara susumu no tsuginaru basho e

kuyashisaya kanashimi ga
ima made sore ijou no yorokobi wo oshiete kureta
soshite, tonari ni itsumo kanarazu
kimi to iu sonzai ga aru to iu koto mo

kanjiru desho
mou nani mo kowaku nante nai

kono te wo nigiri shimete
kimi ni shika dasenai chikara ga
yume wo genjitsu ni kaete yuku kara
tsuyoi shisen no kanata
mayoi nai futari no sugata ga mieru
dakara susumu no saranaru toki e

Once more I’m looking at this world,
Dust and after-images, and faint shadows

You have the resolution,
To shoulder all those burdens on that imposing back of yours

What do I want to do? And why?
Didn’t I decide to go on a lonely journey?

Don’t let go of this hand
Your feelings are crossing over
And causing the sleeping wish in my heart to awaken
At the furthest end of this powerful gaze
Are two figures with no trace of doubt...
That’s why we’ll keep going towards the future

Looking at this crumbling scenery,
I came to realize the miracle of living

Hoping for a special meaning,
I walked hesitantly down the road without a path

Do I want to believe?… Yes I want to believe…
Because I want to walk this path with you!

Don’t avert your gaze
Even though I can’t put this into words,
I desire you from the bottom of my heart.
At the furthest end of this hope
are two figures with no trace no doubt...
That’s why we’ll move on to the next place.

Anger and sorrow,
as shown me joy more than anything else.
Besides, I am always aware
Of you standing right next to me

All the time
There is no need to fear

Hold this hand tightly
Because a power which only you hold
Is turning dreams to reality
At the furthest end of this powerful gaze
Are two figures with no trace of doubt
That’s why we’ll keep going towards that future

DAMN NICE SONG LOL CAN FIND IN MY IMEEM

2008-04-02T13:44:00.003+08:00

woot...today is a off-day of everything...work and training.... gonna play this whole day...haven even complete half of my game collections... nothing much to say also since is my off-day.... even if i talk about it... it is gonna be... i went market this morning and bring some things so that i can cook something to eat at home.... then i go home and play all day long...THE END..... okok... tht was lame... oh ya i still haven watch some of the anime that i bought the other day.... maybe gonna watch it first so.... IT ENDS HERE.... CIAO CIAO =w= ..... Oh ya adding a anime song in too...the lyrics tht is.... lol

2008-04-01T20:44:00.002+08:00

Woot.... Just came back from training... dam tired sia... yesterday was working all day long also.... both days i onli ate one meal so can anyone imagine how hungry i was.... stomach is like 'grrrr' all day long.... oh ya tht is how life is... tomorrow no work nor training wahahahha.... can slack at home all day long.... finally a full day rest... yesterday i also bought the special edition L novel.... dam happy but my wallet hav a big hole after buying it =.=.... nvm wait for my next pay tht is supposedly coming soon.... when it comes.... maybe i will treat one of those who are going out on 5th april lol..... depending on my mood lol.... i can be quite petty also hehe......

2008-04-01T00:39:00.001+08:00

GUNDAM 00 DAYBREAK'S BELL
ねぇこんな形の出逢いしか無かったの? 悲しいね
貴方に死んでも殺めて欲しくも無い …お願い

運命さえ飲み込まれ沈みそうな海へと

願いよ風に乗って夜明けの鐘を鳴らせよ
鳥のように My wishes over their airspace.
無数の波を越え明日へ立ち向かう貴方を
守りたまえ My life I trade in for your pain.
争いよ止まれ

ねぇ人はどうして繰り返し過ちを重ねてく?
進化しない誰もに流れるこの血が大嫌い

炎で裁き合う誰のでもない大地で

澄みわたる未来が来たなら草花も兵器に
宿るだろう My wishes over their airspace.
誰か揺り起こして悪い夢から覚ましてよ
叶うのなら My life I trade in for your pain.
どれだけ祈れば天に届く?

今、朝焼けが海原と私を映す

願いよ風に乗って夜明けの鐘を鳴らせよ
鳥のように My wishes over their airspace.
無数の波を越え明日へ立ち向かう貴方を
守りたまえ My life I trade in for your pain.

振り向かず羽ばたけこの想いを運んであの空を飛んでく
願いは誰にも撃ち落せない

Nee konna katachi no deai shika nakatta no? Kanashii ne
Anata ni shindemo ayamete hoshiku mo nai onegai
Unmei sae nomikomade shizumisouna umi e to

Negai yo kaze ni notte yoake no kane wo narase yo
Tori no you ni My wishes over their airspace
Musuu no nami wo koe Asu e tachimukau anata wo
mamoritamae My life I trade in for your pain
Arasoi yo tomare!

Nee hito wa doushite kurikaeshi ayamachi wo kasaneteku?
Shinka shinai dare ni mo nagareru kono chi ga daikirai
Honnou de sabakiau dare no demo nai daichi de

Sumiwataru mirai ga kita nara kusabana mo
heiki ni yadoru darou My wishes over their airspace
Dare ga yuriokoshite warui yume kara samashite yo
Kanau no nara My life I trade in for your pain
Dore dake inoreba ten ni todoku?

Ima asayake ga unabarato watashi wo utsusu

Negai yo kaze ni notte yoake no kane wo narase yo
Tori no you ni My wishes over their airspace
Musuu no nami wo koe Asu e tachimukau anata wo
mamoritamae My life I trade in for your pain
Furimukazu habatake kono omoi wo hakonde ano sora wo tondeku
Negai wa dare ni mo uchiotosenai

Hey, is it that I could only meet you in such a situation? It's so sad.
Even should it cost my life, I don't want you to kill. Please...
Drinking it up, fate sinks into the future's ocean.

Please, ride on the wind and ring the daybreak's bell
Like a bird, my wishes over their airspace
Keep counting the countless waves, this before you is the future, we'll go to protect it now!
My life I trade in for your pain
Stop fighting that battle, now!

Hey, why do human beings keep repeating their sins?
I hate this blood that flows in everyone's body, devoid of evolution.
The blood that judges others by boiling point, in this land that belongs to no one

Should a utopian future exist, even flowers can bloom on weapons that kills them all...
My wishes over their airspace
Could someone ever wake you up? Can you please wake from this nightmare?
If my dream should come true, My life I trade in for your pain
How long do I have to pray until it reaches the heavens?

Right now, the light of the dawn shines on me and the ocean.

Please, ride on the wind and ring the daybreak's bell
Like a bird, my wishes over their airspace
Keep counting the countless waves, this before you is the future, we'll go to protect it now!
My life I trade in for your pain
Fly away without looking back, embrace the feelings within you, and spread it across the sky
Wishes cannot be shot down by anyone.

TESTING ONLY... LOL

2008-04-01T00:29:00.002+08:00

ok this is my first post of my newly born blog wahahahah.... =w= .... this is only the testing so will be nothing much in this post lol.... will try hard to blog as much as possible lol